DONE!

Today is day 90 and I completed my workout.  My kids made it extra special today, as both were awake and climbing all over me the whole time.  I am so glad to be done and move on with my life.  I'm glad I committed to this and I'm proud of myself.  I am my own worst critic so I wish I lost more weight.  However, I'm not done working out and improving my health so I'll probably lose more eventually.

Here are my results:
Day 1:                                              Day 90:
Weight- 131 lbs.                              124 lbs.
Chest - 34 in.                                   31.5 in.
Waist- 28 in.                                    25.5 in.
Hips- 37 in.                                      35 in.
Right thigh- 22 in.                           20.5 in.
Left thigh- 22 in.                              21 in.
Right arm- 12.5 in                            11 in.
Left arm- 12.5 in.                             11 in.

Day 1

Day 90

Day1

Day 90

Day 1

Day 90

I lost a total of 7 lbs. and 12.5 in. overall.  I don't look completely different, but I made an improvement.  I had hoped to be lean, however I'm still ex-gymnastlike (which is stocky). 
Did I mention that I'm so excited to be done?!?

Thank you to you everyone who encouraged me throughout this journey.  I hope you complete your journeys as well. I just wanted to encourage you to fit in your workouts.  You will feel so much better if you do.  I know I had the excuse as a mom of two young children that there just wasn't enough time in the day for it.  However, watch these videos and you will see you just have to include your kids sometimes :)

Peace out!

3 more days!

My week started off so slow.  I traveled this weekend to celebrate birthdays, and it was so hard to get back into the routine. Anyone else get like that?  If I don't work out two days in a row, it's much harder for me to work out on the third day.  I NEVER skip a Monday workout.  It's always hard to get myself to work out on Monday because generally I just don't want to.  But I know if I do it, the rest of the week will seem easier cause I'll only have to work out 4 more times.  However this Monday, I did not work out.  That means I have to work out Saturday just to get in 5 days this week.  BUT it's my LAST WEEK!!!

Tuesday's workout was Core Synergistics.  I thought I wanted to do that, but I didn't.  And today's workout was Kenpo X.  I thought it wouldn't be bad, but it was.  I'm just really ready to be done!!

I have discovered how AWFUL I feel when I eat bad.  I think that I want these rich, tasty foods because they look so desirable.  So I eat them and then I'm doubled over in pain until the next day.  I know that sounds dramatic, but it really does happen.  Grains, sugar, dairy...they hurt.  I love the way they taste, but my body does not like them anymore.  You would think it would deter me, but no.  I'm still a fat kid at heart.  I think I can get away with eating them once a week.  Everything in moderation, right?  Problem is, just like with not working out for a few days, it's really hard to stop eating bad.  Once you let yourself do it once, it is really hard to get back on track.  Even when it makes you feel horrible for 18 hours.  We've got serious issues here.  But I know that I'm eating better overall.  I'm only human...and a very flawed one at that. 

On Saturday I will do my final measurements, weight, and pics.  Thankfully I'll be done with this journey.  I can't flippin' wait.

10 more days!

I'm just gonna post some pics.  I'm still not thin, but I am in a lot better shape.  I'm trying to look at the bright side...

ALMOST DONE!  AND SO READY TO BE!

19 days left!!

I'm excited that I'm almost done.  I will obviously continue to work out and watch what I eat, but this specific 90 day challenge is almost over and I'm ready to be done.  I'm proud of myself for sticking to it.  It has really helped me learn how to be disciplined.  I can now deny cravings and make working out a priority. 

Before I started this, my weight plateaued between 133-136.  Now I'm staying around 123-126.  I think/hope these 10 lbs are gone forever.  I thought that I would be smaller, but I guess my body feels comfortable at this weight.  I started 100% Paleo yesterday and hope to stick to it for 3 weeks so maybe I will lose a little more weight.  I'm also going to try a few herbs called CCEW, Alfalfa, and ACS to hopefully detox a little bit.  I hate going to the extreme.  I wish old-fashioned working out and watching what you ate produced great results, but they aren't happening as quickly as I want so this is what I'm trying. 

19 more days!!! :)

Day 68- Accepting disappointment? Or try something extreme?

I'm on my way to accepting the fact that I won't look like I wanted to by the end of this journey.  I had a high expectation that I would look skinny and ready for a photo shoot.  Bah!  I didn't think I really thought that, but I am totally let down by my 60 day pictures.  So I guess I was really unrealistic in the beginning.  I saw a friend of mine get ready for a bikini fitness competition and looked amazing in 8 weeks so I thought it was a possibility.  But she was incredibly disciplined with her diet and I haven't been.  I do Paleo about 70% of the time.  That's not enough to eliminate the fat and shred up my body.  It's made a difference, but I'm definitely not getting the results I was hoping for.

So I'm trying to decide if I should go straight Paleo for the last 3 weeks of this journey to see if it improves my results.  I want to do some type of cleanse because I feel so bulky still, but I don't think I want to cut out the protein.  I just know that I need to change up the diet.  I'm not exactly sure what I'm going to do, but Monday morning I will start.  I didn't want to do that because I wanted to eat a maintainable diet; however I'm just not happy with the results so I guess I have to be extreme for a few weeks.

I think that my idea of looking good is being skinny.  Shapely muscles aren't attractive to me.  You can't even tell I have muscles unless I flex.  I'm not going to go around flexing my muscles, so I still don't like what I look like just standing there.  I look okay.  I look fine for having had two babies.  But I'm definitely not skinny therefore I don't feel confident.  I feel like I need to apologize for being so whiny, but this is where I am.  Sorry!

Day 60- annoyed

So, why am I doing this again?  I am really struggling to care right about now.  I just took my measurements, pictures, and weight and I'm not impressed.  I have worked so hard, and you really can't tell a difference.  I thought for sure there would be a significant difference by 2 months into this.  It's very disappointing. 

I still feel heavy.  I feel bulky.  I'm gaining muscle, but not losing fat.  I'm losing inches, but I don't look smaller.  It's discouraging.  I want to look lean and fit.  I just look like an overweight retired gymnast.  Thick is the word I would use to describe my figure.  I thought I would love the way my body was changing.  Noooo...not lovin' it.

I feel healthier and stronger, but I don't look any better.  I feel this pressure to see a noticeable improvement because I'm so committed.  Sure I've cheated on the diet several times, but I haven't with the workouts.  And I know some people would say, "You've only been at this for 2 months."  However I've actually been working out for 7 months and my body doesn't look much different.  In December 2011 I weighed 136 lbs.  Today I weigh 125 lbs.  Why do I look the same?!  I've lost 11.75 inches overall.  Why do I look the same?!

I'm annoyed.  I don't foresee my body making a huge change in the last 30 days of this journey.  But what is my other option?  Stopping and getting bigger and softer?  No.  So I will continue on, I will whine and complain, and I will never be satisfied with my figure.  Yikes, I'm a grouch. 



Day 60

Day 1





A slump

Blah, wah, I hate this.

So, I went to Columbus three weeks in a row to visit family and friends.  I tried to eat well, but mostly failed.  My mom's the devil and always buys cinnamon crunch bagels from Panera.  What am I gonna do?  Let those go to waste?!  NO!  I'm a grateful daughter and I eat one for every meal.  JK!  But at least one a day. 

I mean, let's be honest, that's not the ONLY thing I did wrong.  But anyway...I've gained back 4 lbs!!!  I feel so gross, but I just keep eating terrible food.  It's like I can't stop or something.  And I feel awful WHILE I'm doing it and I continue to do it.  When am I going to learn?!

I have still worked out consistently, but I have not felt good all week.  I've felt heavy, sluggish, and not motivated.  When I work out, I feel so proud of myself and I look in the mirror and see change.  This week I felt terrible and did not see any positive results. 

I've hit a slump.  I need to get rejuvenated.  What's it gonna take??

Halfway!

We have reached day 45!  Well, I should clarify.  I have reached day 45.  Nate hasn't worked out in like 3 weeks or something.  He's just too busy with work.  It's not fitting into his life right now and that's okay.  I would love it if we were doing this together, but I am able to do it on my own. 

In 45 days, I have lost 7 lbs. and 11 inches.  I feel really good!  I'm working so hard and seeing some results.  I'm anxious to see how much my body will change in the last 45 days of this journey.  Maybe I should stop eating ice cream though...

It's kind of awkward that I've been blogging because everyone knows I'm trying to lose weight.  It seems like people feel the need to comment when they see me, not because they can actually see a difference, but because they have read about my journey.  So, if you're reading this, and if you see me sometime soon, you DO NOT have to say anything!  If you don't see a difference, that's okay!  You don't have to lie and say something because you think that's what I want to hear.  I don't like pity. 

Of course it would be great if you saw me and were like, "Hey I can tell you've been working out."  But I've only been at this for 45 days so you really might not be able to tell.  I can tell because of my clothes fitting differently, but it's not a drastic change.  Nate says he can see a big change, but I think he's just saying that...

I know if I would be more strict with the diet I would see a bigger change, but I don't even care anymore.  I read a Paleo blog last night and got this quote: "After two years of living a Paleo Lifestyle, we can safely say that there is no such thing as Perfect Paleo."  THANK YOU!  I'm glad I'm not the only one that thinks it's impossible.  That made me feel so much better.  I have beat myself up over this countless times.  I've felt like I just don't have enough self control to handle this.  I know the diet produces great results and benefits, but I just can't do it 100% of the time.  So knowing other people have come to the conclusion that this lifestyle is great, but not maintainable, was an encouragement. 

I'm excited for the second half of this journey!  And for those of you that have emailed, facebooked, and texted me about your journeys, THANK YOU and GOOD LUCK!  Anyone can do 90 days!  I promise!

On to week 7

Today is the first day of week 7.  My diet was disastrous this weekend.  I tried to make good choices, but I ruined them by having ice cream and other desserts.  I went into the weekend weighing 123 lbs.  Three days later I weigh 126 lbs.  Ridiculous. 

I have this conversation in my head all time time: "It doesn't matter what you weigh.  Just enjoy some ice cream.  Don't worry about what other people think."  And then an hour later, "I will NOT ruin this.  I have worked too hard to sabbotage it with all that sugar.  It's not worth it." 

Sometimes I make the right choice, sometimes I don't. 

I still have 47 days to get down to 120 lbs.  I know I will do that, but it will be difficult to maintain it.  I really hope at the end of the 90 days I don't care about the number and am just proud of my hard work.  It's just so rewarding to see the number go down! 

I was thinking the other day...has there ever been a time in my life where I felt completely confident about my body?  No, I don't think there has.  There's always something that needs to be tighter, smaller, less cellulitey.  Until I don't have to worry about things hanging, I don't think I'll feel "done".  So yes this journey is 90 days, but I know I will have to work my entire life to feel comfortable.  That's kind of annoying and overwhelming.  But it brought me to the conclusion that I HAVE to find out how to feel confident aside from how much I weigh.  Otherwise, I'll always feel like I don't add up. 

Bragging about it

I lost another pound.  That's a total of 7 lbs. in 39 days.  I thought for sure I would lose a lot in the beginning and then it would take awhile to get the last few pounds off.  But, the weight is coming off faster now than it did in the beginning, and I'm not going to complain that I was wrong! 

I weigh less than I did when I got pregnant with my daughter Lilianna.  That's kinda fun to say!  My body still looks completely different than it did before kids, but I'm happy with the results so far.  Today is a brag post.  Sorry for the arrogance.  However, I will never brag about what kids and weight loss have done to my chest- YIKES!  It's scary.  Good thing Nate loves me regardless!! :)

I don't get it

I have had a few people ask when I'm going to post pics.  So here's a little embarrassing story:
Today after I worked out I thought, "I can see some definition finally.  I'm gonna take a pic and post it to my blog."  So the picture was taken and it did not look like I thought it should!!  I don't get it!!!  I seriously, really, honestly have a problem.  Why do I look in the mirror and think, "Yay, I can see muscle over fat.  Take a picture for proof."  And then I take a picture, and it's not proof.  The truth did not set me free.  It actually kinda ticked me off.  Dangit, why do I think I look better than I really do?!  That is such a weird problem that I really don't think anyone else struggles with!!!

So I'm not posting the picture!!  Sorry, friends.  Until you can actually tell by a picture that I have some abs, I'm not showing them to anyone!!  But I did lose another pound!! 6 pounds down in 38 days.  I know it's not a lot, but I'm happy about it!

That week went fast!

This week was busy!  Of course with Monday being a holiday, it was a short work week.  Plus I went to Columbus Tuesday-Wednesday to go to a concert with my sisters.  And my workload picked up and I am officially trained and ready to handle all the administrative work for my job. 

Because of the busyness, I ate some unhealthy meals and missed a workout.  However, I still managed to lose another pound!  I'm glad, but isn't it ironic?  Don't ya think?  I would categorize this week as "bad" week, yet I lost weight.  Who understands this whole losing weight process?!  NOT ME!  But I'll take it!

On to week 6 of 13.  I feel like I'm finally in a healthy place.  I still care about my weight, but I'm doing as much as I can.  If I deprive myself anymore I'll go crazy. So as long as I can manage this lifestyle for the next 55 days, I think I'll feel pretty good in the end. 

1/3 of the way done!

We made it through 30 days!  It wasn't pretty, but we did it!  I felt guilty about all the food I ate this weekend, but that feeling didn't last long.  I just took my measurements and I've lost a total of 8.5 inches!  WOW!  We took pictures as well, and it's still true that I have reverse anorexia.  I always think I look better than I actually do!  There's no denying the truth of a picture!  I do see improvement, but not enough to brag about!

So again, the diet.  I have decided to stick to it as much as I can, but I can't eliminate everything and then feel bad about myself every time I have something delicious.  I know the diet is soooo important, but my happiness is more important.  I want to enjoy life!  And if that means I'm addicted to food, then I'm addicted to food.  I don't care that it puts me in a happy place.  I do not want to be upset with myself for enjoying dessert when I'm on a date with my husband.  Or grabbing ChickfilA with my friends and their kids.  That's life and I love those things. 

I'm proud of our efforts.  I'm feeling good.  I'm glad we still have 60 days left because I have a long way to go, but I'm happy with what I'm seeing.  8.5 inches and 4 pounds are gone.  I would have liked to weigh a little less, but it's okay.  I've got 2 more months to lose 7 lbs.  And if I do it slowly, it's more likely that I'll keep it off for good.  Changing your body takes a loonnnngggg time.  I wish it wasn't so hard, but it's very rewarding to be achieving goals!

Beautiful, Precious Memorial Day

Today is day 29 of our 90 day journey.  It's just been a beautiful, wonderful day full of sunshiney blessings!  I would say the only thing I can complain about is my kids are pooping machines.  We've changed their sheets 5 times over the course of the weekend.  And this morning we had to do it again! 

But after that fiasco, the day has been WONDERFUL!  We all 4 lied around in our bed for a good hour.  Then had breakfast together.  Then drank our coffee, listened to music, read the Bible, and talked on the porch.  Nate and I worked out while Tristan napped and Lily watched Mickey Mouse Clubhouse.  Then had lunch and played outside until now.  As I type, Nate and the kiddos are napping.  Soon I will get ready to shower and prepare some stuff to grill out for dinner.  And maybe after dinner we will even get Handel's ice cream! :) 

It has been kinda strange having Nate home for the last 4 days in a row.  That NEVER happens!  But it's been great.  We even went on a date last night and got to have a real conversation!

Marriage is precious.  Babies are precious.  Life is precious.  Things have been hard for our family for awhile, but today is precious.  I am so grateful!

Rough week 4

Man, we were so busy this week.  We only worked out 4 days and had to eat meals out a few times.  Again, I don't want to beat myself up about it, but it throws you off!  When you're used to intently thinking about every ingredient you put in your body, it's hard to not care about a little ChickfilA!!  I want to not care...but I do.

Even though the week has been rough, I've managed to lose a pound.  My clothes are definitely fitting different.  I enjoy that!  Today is day 27 so in 3 more days we will take our 30 day picture.  I'm anxious to see if there is a visible change.  I've only lost 4 lbs., but again, my clothes don't fit the same so I'm wondering if it will be an obvious difference from day 1's picture.   I hope so.  That will give me some more motivation if I can SEE the routine is paying off.  If I really can't see a difference...well...that will be annoying!

We are hoping to enjoy the holiday weekend as a family.  We had a few plans, but Tristan and Lily have been throwing up so we will just be hanging around our house.  I'm just happy Nate's off work 3 days in a row.  That's so rare!   I hope everyone else gets quality time with their friends and families!

Busy, Busy

I started a new job this week and had a few meetings therefore have been pretty busy.  I haven't actually done any work yet, but I'm excited about this opportunity.  Someone Nate works with needed an administrative assistant for awhile. I get to work from home so I can still be with my children each day.  That is just amazing to me!  I miss teaching middle school a lot!  I mean I think about teaching weekly, but I feel called to be home full-time.  So when this opportunity came up, I was just excited to be able to make an income while still at home with my babies.  I'm feeling very grateful!

The job may not allow a lot of time to blog, but I WILL work out everyday still.  Nate and I haven't worked out together since last Tuesday.  I have been working out during Tristan's morning nap time.  But I think I'm going to have to go back to waking up at 5:30 in order to get in the work out.  I hate getting up, but I love having it done so I can get the housework done without stress.  And I really miss working out with someone. 

This week's workouts are different from the previous 3 weeks.  They call it a recovery week.  Monday was yoga X and I've done that every week.  But Tuesday was core synergistics and that was new and a gooood workout.  It's the type of workout I'm used to.  Fast-paced and lots of sweating.  It was exhausting, but I felt so good when I was done.

My weight has not changed.  At least it's not going up, but I would really prefer it go down!  Oh well, I'm doing what I can.  No shame in that.

24 days complete!

69 days left

Well, we just completed 3 full weeks!  We've definitely struggled on the weekends with the diet and getting in a workout, but life is too busy.  I don't want to beat myself up about not being perfect.  The point of this journey was to try to stick to something for 90 days to see a big transformation, but the diet is impossible.  I would much rather learn how to do things in moderation than to try to completely eliminate stuff for a season.  It's just too hard.  EVERYTHING has sugar in it.  Dairy tastes good.  And I miss bread.  That's why I had 4 pieces of pizza at my son's birthday party!!  Oops.

I know I feel better when I eat better, but seriously I'm annoyed.  And I'm really annoyed about the fact that I can't deviate from the diet AT ALL or I gain 3 lbs.  That's just ridiculous.  I'm never gonna be a fitness model so WHY do I need to eat like this????

I'm just questioning if I can do this any longer.  I can handle the workouts.  But the stupid restrictive diet...it's just too much.  However what's the alternative?  Never feel comfortable in my clothes again?  Either I keep going and allow a few cheats here and there, or gain back the weight and feel gross.  What's more important?  Ice cream or fitting into my jeans? 

I'm really struggling to find a balance.  I want to think about this clearly and with a healthy perspective.  This is tough. 

Day 19

I am determined to get this workout in, even though I don't want to or have time for it.  Our son's first birthday party is tomorrow and I have a lot of work to do to prepare for it.  So why am I on the computer writing my blog?  Because we got a new touch-screen computer and it's fun.  I had to try it out!!

Nate hasn't worked out since Tuesday because he's been too busy with work.  I have enjoyed sleeping in this week, but it's really annoying having to workout when the kids are awake.  I feel so anxious thinking, "When am I going to fit in a workout?"  If I could wake up at 5:30 am everyday I would, but it's just not realistic. 

I didn't get to blog yesterday because we were too busy running errands and cleaning for the party.  However, I would like to brag about the fact that I did an hour and 22 minutes of yoga X.  And I am actually seeing an improvement already!  I'm more flexible and able to hold the positions longer.  Who would have thought Tony Horton would be right? HA!  Not me!

I still hate the scale.  I am down to 128 but that's not good enough.  Since I was 127 all last week, I feel like I need to be there or lower in order to feel satisfied.  The obsession with the number is not good.  It shouldn't matter...but it does.  I'm not a model for healthy thinking.  Please don't follow in my footsteps because I am wrong.  At least I can admit it!

I HATE THE SCALE

It's the scale's fault.  I didn't do anything to deserve that wretched number.  Seriously, 130...again!  You've got to be kidding me.  I know I ate like a teenage boy all weekend, but the number just keeps going up.  I thought I was in the 120s forever.  WRONG!  I hate you, scale.  You're mean, you're ugly, and you don't share.

My workout was extra long this morning.  I had to stop and come back 50 thousand times to tend to potty training tasks, upload pictures on this dumb computer, answer the phone, and let a man in to pick up products he needed for a surgery.  I felt like I worked out for 4 hours.  I didn't even get to do ab ripper x because the kids needed fed.  They always need fed!

Well, as you can tell, my attitude is great.  The only positive thing I have to say is my sweet husband got me lots of new workout clothes for my birthday.  Apparently he's already sick of the 'maternity sweatpant and sports bra from high school' look I've been sporting each morning.  Now he can enjoy looking at a chubby highlighter working out next to him BRIGHT and early. 

Day 17, I hate you.

28 is Great!

I have had a wonderful birthday!  My children slept in, I got several tasks done around the house (including cleaning up Lilianna's poop smashed in the carpet, couch, and pack n play), we went to the park on this gorgeous day, shared an all-fruit smoothie, both kids took great naps, and now I'm having dinner made for me!  Success!

I was dragging during our workout this morning, but it feels great knowing we got it over with early on.  I'm going to relax and enjoy my sweet little family and whine about the fact that I'm getting old. 

Thanks for all the texts, calls, messages, and facebook posts!  They have made me feel loved and blessed!  Hopefully this year I will be in the best shape of my life as a 28-year -old mom of two!

Disastrous

My diet was pretty much non-existent over the weekend and I gained back 2 flipping pounds!!  I was worried I would do this....ANNDDD I did!  I'm so weak when it comes to pizza, donuts, Cheesecake Factory and Jeni's ice cream!  But it was my birthday celebration and Mother's day so give me a break!

But seriously I hate that.  The fact that I feel guilty about giving in to some wheat and sugar like it's the devil or something is just dumb.  This diet is so restrictive it's pretty much impossible to stick to while eating out.  I'm annoyed with myself for gaining 2 lbs., but I want to be able to live a little.  However, I said I would do 90 days, and once those 90 days are complete, I won't have to feel so guilty.  I want to eat healthy, I even enjoy eating healthy, but celebrating special occasions usually means eating fatty, heavy foods and I'm going to do it every once in awhile.  It's just life.  But until these 90 days are over, I HAVE to choose more wisely. 

I didn't work out on Saturday either. The day was just too busy to fit it in.  Oh well...a disastrous weekend does not mean I've failed this journey.  I just need to refocus.  So I've eaten well all day and did my workout and I feel better.  I'm back on track and plan on sticking to the course.  Just 75 more days!

Days 13 and 14 were not my friends.  But Day 15, I showed you who's boss.

Way too scared to work out!

Nate and I were awakened at 3:45 a.m. to blood-curdling screams.  It was unbelievably terrifying to listen to a woman across the street scream and beg for help as someone was apparently attacking her. We were so scared that I called 911 and Nate was throwing clothes on quickly to go out to help her.  We couldn't see anything, but this went on for several minutes. 

Finally the police arrived and we could hear her explaining to them what had happened.  We couldn't make out what she was saying, but it sounded like she was calm and they had the situation under control.  I sat in my bedroom shaking and my stomach turning as I thought we had just heard someone being murdered or raped just feet away from our house.  It took me good 2 hours to calm down and fall back asleep.

So, needless to say, we didn't get up at 5:30 to work out!  But we were able to workout at about 10 a.m. while Tristan napped.  It is so rare for Nate to be home during the day on a weekday, but it was great to get the workout done.  He was summoned for business calls the whole time, but I did the whole workout!! 

Also, last night I had a huge victory!  I resisted temptation and stuck to the diet at the banquet!  The only non-paleo item I had was salad dressing.  I wasn't going to mess up my streak with cheesecake!  I don't even like cheesecake!  But no sweets for 10 days is huge for me!  So, go me.  I'm the bomb dot com.

My weight has stayed at 127 lbs. most of the week.  I'm a little nervous about the weekend because we are heading to Hilliard to celebrate Mother's day and my birthday.  I'm going to try to stay away from the sweets, but with special occasions it's so difficult to deny my sweet tooth!  Maybe one cheat won't kill me...

Day 11: Yoga is Dumb

I seriously hate yoga.  How do people get into this?  I was a gymnast, and I can't do half of those moves they're demonstrating.  Of course we didn't even get to do the whole workout because the kids got up too early again.  But I guess I do feel less sore because we did all kinds of stretching.  However I don't think I'll ever like it.  It's just not my style of workout. 

I don't have anything else to write about.  Except I went to the doctor today for my yearly exam.  Gross, right?  Anyway, taking two children two and under...not the best decision I've ever made!  Especially since Lily is in her first week of potty training! Yeah, that was a trip.  But the doctor's office scale weighed me a pound heavier than my scale at home.  I'm thinking it was just because I had eaten and stuff before I went.  So I think my scale is pretty accurate.  Good to know! 

Tonight will be a test of my will power.  I'm going to banquet with a friend and dinner is provided.  I haven't had any ingredient off the paleo diet for 9 days.  I doubt all the food will be on my diet, so I'm wondering how I'll do.  I'm telling myself I won't cheat, but when the temptation's right in front of me it will be very hard.  I really want to stick to the diet...I really feel so good and the weight is finally coming off.  I WILL SUCCEED!  Well...we'll see ;)

Day 10- Feeling Great!

I am so surprised, but I feel great!  Just last week I was so exhausted, irritable, and weak I was ready to stop the diet.  Now after just 3 days of no symptoms, I feel better than I have in a long time!  I think my body is rejoicing because I haven't put any sugar in it for over a week!  I'm not gonna lie...I'm proud of myself.  And I've lost 4 lbs in 9 days.  Not too shabby!

Yesterday we did plyometrics.  That is a hard workout, but I like it the most out of all the ones we've done so far.  We sweat a ton, our muscles burn, and we're out of breath. It feels like we're burning the most calories with this workout.  However, it switches up so much that you don't get used to anything.  I love that.

I actually slept in today so I haven't done my workout yet.  When Tristan goes down for his morning nap I will do shoulders and arms.  I just felt like I needed to write about how good I feel. I wanted to encourage anyone trying a new lifestyle that it does get better.  Stick to your plan!  It may take your body several days, maybe even weeks to adjust, but you will feel great eventually!

Much love from the hood, (I really do live in the hood, don't judge)
April

Yea! My Name's Positive Polly!

Day 8: Choosing to be positive! 

No, really, I have a lot to be positive about.  These are totally unrelated to this physical journey, but my kids hit some major milestones!  Lily decided to potty train herself yesterday!  She has been wearing panties for over 24 hours and they've stayed dry the whole time!  I've always heard, "They'll let you know when they're ready." So far, I totally believe in this saying!  She is doing so well!  I'm so very proud of her.  She's such a big girl now!  And Mr. T started walking several weeks ago, but is off and running as of yesterday!!  He's so stinking cute!  I love that boy so much. 

This is all so exciting but sad at the same time.  They're growing up so fast! My heart swells and my eyes fill up with tears just thinking about how quickly they learn and change.  AHH, savor these moments, everyone.  They're so precious!

Onto P90X and such...it was another early morning, but so glad to get it over with.  We did chest and back plus ab ripper x.  I hurt my shoulder a little bit doing the push-ups and pull-ups.  Hopefully it's just tweaked and not injured.  I'll get to rest it a little since we don't do anymore pull-ups until Wednesday.  But I'm feeling good!  I think the weakness I was experiencing last week was from sugar withrawal.  Hopefully I'm through that.

I'll end this post with expressing my anger toward my husband.  He's already lost 6 pounds and I hate him.  Just kidding!  I love him, but it's just not fair how easy it is for men!  He also wanted me to share this video.  Enjoy finding out how awful sugar is!

http://articles.mercola.com/sites/articles/archive/2012/05/07/the-sweetener-that-is-more-dangerous-than-alcohol.aspx?e_cid=20120507_DNL_art_1
Also, how awful would it be to find out they used your obese body and cut your head off for a video describing how disgusting fat is?

One Week Down, 12 To Go

Yesterday we did Kenpo X which is kickboxing.  It was a little cheesey, but a good workout.  I can't get over how awkward Tony Horton is. He's the guy that designed P90X and leads you through all the workouts.  Nate truly believes that Steve Carell watched and learned from him in order to prepare for his role in the show The Office.  I agree.  I'm uncomfortable through most of the workouts, just like I am when I watch that show. 

So today we got to rest and relax.  It's our one and only day off.  I kinda wish that we had to workout though because I eat better on days that I work out.  I'm craving everything I can't eat.  But, I've only cheated ONCE with that dang milkshake last Tuesday so I'm not going to do it again today.  I lost 2 pounds this week too, so I don't want to mess that up!

Just 83 more days!!!

How much longer?

I have felt awful all day.  Well, almost all day.  We woke up and worked out at 5:30 a.m., then I ate breakfast and tried to go back to bed but the kids were up right after 7 a.m.  I felt fine during the workout and after I showered, but from about 10 a.m. on, I've felt weak, tired, light-headed, and have had a headache. 

I don't understand what's going on?  And how much longer am I going to have to feel like this?  I am determined to stick to the diet, but if that's the problem, then I can't do this for 90 days.  I'm hot and about to pass out throughout the day, and I can't take care of the kids feeling like this.  I'm confused because Nate and I are eating the same things for the most part and he doesn't feel like this at all.

The workouts are not the issue.  It's hard getting up in the morning, but for the most part I can do them and am somewhat enjoying them.  I won't give up on the workouts no matter what I do with the diet.  I just wish I could feel better.  Losing weight is hard.  It's a test of your will power and discipline, but I don't think it should cause you to be ill!

Oh well, Day 5 is done.  I'm proud of our efforts so far!

Yucky, Year-long Yoga

I have never done yoga before this morning, and I'm glad.  It was so annoying.  We did the same sequence of positions for 40 minutes straight.  There was a slight variation each time, but sooo incredibly boring.  It was difficult and we sweated like pigs, but I did not enjoy it.  And the workout was so flipping long.  An hour and 32 minutes.  Are you kidding me?!  We only go to do a little over 40 minutes because the kids woke up, but I told Nate he is going to have to convice me every week to do that DVD.  I guess it's necessary, but ugh.

We are both so sore from the week.  But two more days and we finally get a break! We've done so well with the diet even though I've felt very weak at times.  I think I might be dehydrated because once I drank more water I felt better. 

Day 4 is in the books. 

Free at last!!!!!!!

Thank God Almighty, I am free at last!!!

CAUTION:  I may discuss topics that are TMI for some of you. Stop reading now if you don't want to know.

I have had a child in my womb or on my boob for 3 and a half years straight.  But today was my last day of nursing my son Tristan!  I will experience a freedom I haven't had in so long starting tomorrow.  I'm a little excited about it!  It's like a weight's been lifted from my chest- HA, get it! 

No, I was so very thankful to get pregnant so easily AND to be able to nurse both children for their first year, but I'm ready to be done.  And I'm hoping my appetite decreases cause I was always hungry when I nursed.  I might actually feel like I have my own body back soon.  I've been growing children for so long, I forget what that feels like!

Ok, anyway, today we got to sleep in a bit.  We didn't work out until almost 8 am.  It was arms and shoulders and I have no clue what I'm doing with the weights.  I don't know when to use which weight, so this will definitely be a learning experience.  It was a good workout, a long workout, but I need to work on form and stuff.  Hopefully I'll get better and more confident.

I cheated on the diet last night.  Anna Niciu, I'm blaming you.  That chocolate milkshake tasted pretty flipping good though!  :) But one small set-back and I won't do it again for the rest of the week.

Day 3 complete. 

Day 2- Good, but mostly bad

I don't have a lot to say.  I just know that 4:45 am is too early to be bopping around like an idiot.  Today's workout was plyometrics which is all jump work.  It was a great workout, and I was able to do it all!  However, Nate and I had to take turns jumping in order to keep our built in the 1920s home intact.  And so we didn't wake up the sleeping babies.
But, I don't feel good at all.  Very weak and sluggish.  I thought the diet would give me energy.  I wonder if I'm not eating enough?  I'm grumpy cause I'm tired and blah.  I'm not hungry, but I feel like I could pass out at any moment.
One more good thing- I lost a pound.  So I'm basically skin draped over bones now. 

Holy Cow! Day 1

So, I'm like blown away about how many people read blogs!  I never guessed anyone would read this stupid little thing, but holy cow, it's cray cray.  I have received so many positive emails, messages, and texts it's unreal!  Thank you all for your encouragement. Now I REALLY feel like I have to do this!

I also feel like I need to explain something.  Although I have a degree in Language Arts and taught English for a few years, I am NOT a writer.  I am not eloquent, creative, or talented in any way.  But if you're looking for sarcastic, honest, and whiny- I'm your girl.  No but really, I've already spotted many grammatical/spelling errors and they are reallllly bugging me, but I'm not going to fix them.  This is just supposed to be fun for me.  So please don't make fun of my writing mistakes behind my back even though I laugh out loud in my husband's face when he messes up!! ;) (love you, Nate)

Ok, so moving on to the real reason I'm doing this. Day 1 was so much easier than I thought it would be.  I held back a little too much because I thought it was going to be so intense I would die.  But it really wasn't.  I think I'm actually quite prepared to do the workouts after doing the Jillian Michaels DVDs for four months.  So that was encouraging!  And I'm so glad Nate is doing this with me.  It makes getting up at 5 a.m. a whole lot easier.  I am definitely tired right now, but it will just make it easier to go to bed tonight.

I had eggs and kiwi for breakfast, paleo granola and carrots for lunch, an apple for a snack, and I'm making grilled chicken, sweet potatoe fries (with coconut oil), and asparagus for dinner.  Easy as pie.  Oh, I want some pie!

Here's the paleo granola recipe.  It is really good.  I baked it a touch too long, so that's the only thing I would change.  The instructions said to bake for 20-25 min and it didn't look done to me so I left it in for 35 minutes.  I would say 25 minutes probably would have been perfect.  I had this for lunch with coconut milk.  I have always loved cereal so this is a great substitute. 

http://paleomg.com/paleo-granola/

Thanks again to all that have been so kind and encouraging!

Today we bought a pull-up bar, most of the weights we'll need, and all the paleo food we can eat.  The paleo diet is going to be the hardest part by far.  No dairy, grains, or sugar.  Shoot me in the face now.  So because our world is going to change tomorrow, we had McDonald's for breakfast. spaghetti for lunch, Five Guys Burgers and Fries for dinner, and Ben and Jerry's ice cream for dessert.  I feel sick!  But I won't be able to have those glorious foods for 90 days so I had to get it allllll in!!

Here are my measurements:

Weight: 131 lbs
Chest: 34 in
Waist: 28 in
Hips: 37 in
Right thigh: 22 in
Left thigh: 22 in
Right arm: 12.5 in
Left arm: 12.5 in

After taking the photos, I have decided NOT to upload them yet!  Wow, it was not fun to see, but hopefully everything will change soon!  If I see a big enough improvement after the first 30 days, then I will post the before pics.

My goals: TO FINISH all 90 days.  To stick to the diet no matter how hard it seems.  A good friend of mine just starting competing in bikini fitness competitions and I asked for her advice. She said that the diet is the hardest part but it is what changed her body the most.  I believe it, because for 4 months I've worked out consistently, but my body hasn't changed enough because I still ate what I wanted for the most part.  I am determined to eat right!

So by the end of the 90 days, I want to weigh 120 lbs and feel good in a size 4.  I have to because I'm in my little sister's wedding August 17th and my dress is a size 4!!!  I don't have any other goals in mind regarding my measurements cause I don't really know what's a good number.  I just need them all to go down!!

Tomorrow at approximately 5:15 am we will begin our journey.  Yikes.  I'm nervous and kind of excited! :)

Why am I doing this?!?!



On our honeymoon



I'm asking myself if I've gone mad...but really, I WANT to do this.  I've wanted to do this for long time, but I finally have the motivation to actually follow through. 

Here's a little background info for those that are wondering...

I have always had a smaller frame and stayed pretty active.  I cheered, danced, and did gymnastics through high school.  So my average weight was about 115 lbs during college.  I was never satisfied with my body, but I also didn't work out all that much.  I would get into the habit of working out, but after a few months would take it out of my routine and it didn't really affect my figure too much.

I was in the best shape when I got married. Like most brides, I worked out, tried to eat right, and lost weight for my wedding day. At 23 years old, I was about 110 lbs. and felt comfortable in my clothes and felt healthy.  However, soon into our marriage, my husband got a new job, and we had to live 2 hours from each other.  This caused me to eat out a lot, which in turn helped me put on 10 lbs very quickly. I was running and training for a 5-mile race, but I could not keep the weight off due to all the chipotle and panera I was consuming.  I also lost my period and was having major hormonal issues, and I could not stop gaining weight.  So, I got up to about 125 lbs, then saw a natural doctor and he helped get my cycle back to normal, and then BAM- got pregnant unexpectedly with our first child!

39 weeks pregnant with baby #1 (168 lbs)

I got up to a whopping 168 lbs with the pregnancy and I was HOT!  No, not at all actually.  I know that some women look absolutely beautiful while pregnant.  I am not one of those women!!  I got huge...everywhere.  I didn't acually know how big I was until I saw pictures.  I was embarrassed.  I never wanted to be that big again.  I gaind 43 lbs with my daughter, and I naively thought I would be back down to a size 2 and 115 lbs in no time.

38 weeks pregnant with baby #2 (157 lbs)

HA- I was wrong!  I worked out pretty consistently for about 5 months and got down to 135 lbs, but never lost any more weight.  I stopped trying to lose the weight and I was ready to accept that I was just going to be 20 lbs more than I was before my child...and then BAM- got pregnant with baby #2!  I wasn't even done nursing my first child and was pregnant again.  But, this time the weight didn't go up right away.  I was so very sick for over 20 weeks with my son that I lost about 7 lbs and got down to 128 lbs.  But, by the end, I delivered my son weighing 157 lbs.  Not AS bad as my first pregnancy, but still so far awy from where I wanted to be.

After having my son, I waited 7 months to start trying to lose weight.  I got down to 135 lbs again without really trying.  But, I still wasn't comfortable at that weight, so on January 2, like every other American, I made the resolution to lose the baby weight.

For four months, I have worked out 4 days a week using Jillian Michaels DVDs and I feel good.  Good, but not great. So, here I am, mother of two, and a totally different body than I used to have.  My daughter is now 2.5 and my son is 11 months old.  I don't want to have another baby for at least 2 more years.  So it's time.  It's time for me to get this weight off and feel GREAT about myself again.

I want to be comfortable in my clothes.  I don't want anything hanging over my pants.  I don't want to have to hide my stomach in big shirts anymore.

So because I am a goal/task-oriented person, I thought P90X was a great choice.  It's rigorous, but there is an end-date.  I can do 90 days.  I can do it!  So, a few more days of eating whatever I want and being a fat kid, and on Monday the torture begins.  I'm excited!

Tomorrow I will post my start weight and other measurements...and maybe some pictures.  I'm not sure if I'm ready to do the pics or not!!  But, feel free to follow my journey!!

Getting started...

I have decided to start blogging.  Not for anyone to read really, but to help motivate myself on this journey I'm about to begin with my husband.  We are going to start P90X on Monday, April 30th and I DON'T want to give up!  Sooo...I thought if I HAD to share about it, even if ONE person reads this, I will be obligated to finish! 
So feel free to follow along, check in periodically, or just wait for the end results.  I might complain, brag, or be annoying...who knows!  But I am DETERMINED to be different by the end.  And I'm soooo glad my husband Nathan has agreed to do this with me!